Random thoughts

There is only one month before SC deadline. I don’t know if I can make it, but I will try my best effort.

I felt a lot of pressure due to 5-year normal graduation duration for a PhD student. It is already the second semester for my 4^th year, or senior year mapping to an undergraduate, but I still hang somewhere and somewhat confused about my future. Where am I going to end up with? In academia, or in industry? Stay here, or go back to my home country?

My boss is not taking care of me as well as before. He is just interested in applying for funding and doing Massive Open Online Course (MOOC). I have to manage myself and seek help from a postdoc in our group. At this time point, I get to know what a real PhD student should work like. You have to find your idea, start your own project, prove the concept by publications. No one else, except yourself, can actually strive every day and night towards your own goal.

I am a little overwhelmed with research/study/life balance now. My English still sucks, but I don’t even spend time reading English news. I cannot follow my passion to go to gym every day, because I feel otherwise I don’t have enough energy to do my daily research. As the deadline of SC is approaching, the atmosphere is more intensive.

Such is life. No solution to it yet. But I am kind of looking forward to the wonderful vacation trip after the deadline. Hope everything will be fine.